8 Important Self-Loving Qualities Before Finding True Love

Spend Time To Love Yourself Before You Start Searching True Love

By Diana Nadim
8 Important Self-Loving Qualities Before Finding True Love

8 Important Qualities To Work On Before You Start Searching For The One

We all want to love and be loved in return. The great martial arts legend Bruce Lee once said that

"Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our heart mature and our liv becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable." 

This basically sums it all up; love is a profound force of nature! We do not have control over when, how, and where love will start to show itself in our lives. All we can do is try to invite it into our lives.

Before we start searching for true love, we should first ensure that we appreciate ourselves properly as it is impossible to appreciate and love others without loving ourselves first. The following are some of the essential qualities that you should work on before searching for love:

1. Confidence

It is impossible for you to love yourself if you are not confident in yourself, your abilities, and even your decisions. You can build your confidence by having an image of yourself that you are proud of and also by affirming yourself and by questioning your inner critic. The success of your relationships will be influenced by the level of your self-confidence as a relationship cannot work if you have low self-esteem. 

2. Authenticity

This means always being your true self at all times. Do not try to hide the imperfections you have,  you should in fact, embrace them. One of the best things you can do for yourself is being real with yourself as this will give your partner a chance to see the real you from the beginning. Being authentic will give you a chance at finding your true love. You will get someone who truly appreciates you for who you really are without you having to pretend.  You will also be able to work through the challenges that come with being in a relationship. 

3. Being open-minded

This is a very essential quality when it comes to finding true love. Before you start looking for your true love you must first learn to have an open mind which will help you to grow and to strengthen your belief in yourself. Open-mindedness enables you to remove barriers that might hinder you from finding your true love as you are able to open up and to connect with individuals around you. 

4. Happiness

Learning to have a sense of joy, contentment, and well-being is very important. Being happy is another quality that helps you to find your true love. Naturally, people like being around individuals who are lively and happy; happiness is contagious! One sure way of ensuring that you are happy is by choosing to focus on your energy on doing and also thinking about things that make you happy. When you are happy you will be like a magnet, and people will be glad to be in your life, giving you an opportunity of finding your true love. 

5. Positivity

You should ensure that you are always on your best self. When you start seeing the glass as half-full rather than half-empty, things change in your life as you start being happier. When you are optimistic you will attract people who are also optimistic in life, you will also be able to see the best in yourself and in people around you.

6. Forgiveness

We all make mistakes and for us to be able to move forward, we must be able to forgive ourselves. You need to reflect on your past mistakes and be able to put them behind you as it’s only then you can be able to have great self-worth which will help you love yourself even more. Being able to forgive yourself is the key to a lasting relationship; it helps to do away with the feeling of inadequacy. 

7. Trust

You should also work on your self-trust. This means learning to trust yourself and your very own instincts. This is essential as it will help you to know what is best for you and what is not, helping you make better life decisions. Self-trust is, therefore, an important step to self-love which is the key to finding your true love. Self-trust also plays a very significant role in relationships as it’s impossible for you to trust another person before you trust yourself. 

8. Acceptance

Being able to accept yourself as enough is another important quality that you should look forward to mastering before finding your true love. Self-acceptance allows you to overcome low self-esteem. The reason why this is important is that other people cannot be able to accept you if you are not able to accept yourself fully, this means that you become easily accepted by the society if you fully embrace your true self.

Finding True Love In Your 30s

When it comes to finding true love, age is just but a number! This means that you can be able to find true love at any age; for those who were not lucky in love in their 20s, there is still hope for you in your 30s. The following are some of the ways of finding love in your 30s:

1. Letting go of the past

The fact that you are in your 30s and you are yet to find your true love means that you have dealt with heartbreak before. You need to learn to put this traumatic part of your life behind you so that you can move forward. 

2. Knowing what you want

This is where you put things into perspective. What you were looking for in a partner when you were in your 20s is very different from what you should be looking for in a partner in your 30s. So take your time to know what exactly you are looking for.

3. Letting your guard down

After unsuccessful relationships in your 20s, it’s natural for you to put your guard up so as to avoid getting hurt again. This, however, is a barrier for you when it comes to finding true love in your 30s so you need to lower your guard down. 

Finding True Love In Your 40s

Some of the ways of finding true love in your 40s include:

1. Recognizing what you are bringing to the table

By this time, you have a lot of experiences which are a golden as it will give you the confidence you need to go for what you really want. 

2. Owning where you are in life

The society has some expectations on the time when we should be able to find true love and this can make it very challenging to be single in your 40s.  Do not let thes expectations and timelines bring you down.

3. Embracing being single

One of the best ways of encountering more romantic opportunities when you are in your 40s is by embracing being single and having a circle of single friends. You will have more fun which will make it easier for you to attract the right partner as you will be full of positive energy. 

Finding True Love In Your 50s

In your 50s, finding true love can be challenging but you should not give up. The following are some of the ways of finding true love in your 50s:

1. Prioritizing love in your life

This is where you put everything else aside and focus on finding your true love and happiness. Make this your priority and take every opportunity that you get as it might lead you to your true love. 

2. Being confident

When you are in your 50s, it’s easy for you to keep focusing on negative things about yourself. Build your confidence by focusing on the positives only and your confidence will help you attract someone special. 

3. Investing in your appearance

Your appearance means a lot even in your 50s, therefore, ensure that you dress and present yourself in the best way possible when meeting new people. You never know when love will knock at your door! 

Finding True Love After A Divorce

After a divorce, it’s normally hard to know what to do next as a result of the trauma and negative energy associated with the divorce. You can overcome that feeling and find true love by doing the following: 

1. Learning to love yourself more

You will not be able to love others until you have learn to love yourself and this is why this is very important.

2. Letting go of the pain

Holding on to the pain you have gone through will make you not to move forward as you will forever be stuck in the past. Let the past be in the past, make peace with yourself, and open a new happy chapter in your life. 

3. Start dating

You cannot find your true love without opening your heart to love again and the first step in achieving this is to start dating again. 

True Love Quotes

True love stories never have endings – Richard Bach

The course of true love never did run smooth – William Shakespeare

True love is selfless. It is prepared to sacrifice – Sadhu Vaswani

True love cannot be found where it does not exist, nor can it be denied where it does – Torquato Tasso

True love bears all, endures all and triumphs! – Dada Vaswani


When it comes to finding true love, age does not matter. Also, it does not matter what your past experiences have been. All you need to do is to learn to put your past behind, love yourself, be happy, and love will surely come your way.